Ah, food service. You love your coworkers and as much as you like your job, you actually hate your job.
Whether it’s a bothersome customer or a frustrating manager, we’ve all been there and dealt with that. And, ya know, all of these ridiculous situations as well…
1. That one lady that rolls her eyes and tells you what she wants to drink while you’re in the middle of you’re introducing yourself.
Like, ok, Sharon, I wasn’t talking or anything…
2. The kitchen ran out of kids mac & cheese because it’s 30 minutes before closing on a Sunday so you ask if the child would like a grilled cheese instead and the kid is not here for your suggestions.
You’re the reason I’ll never have kids.
3. When you can’t use someone’s coupon because it’s expired and all of a sudden that sweet little lady turns into Satan.
I… I don’t make the rules. I just work here.
4. Someone requests that the kitchen make them a special from last week because they don’t understand the concept of a special and the kitchen staff, management, and the owner say no.
If you wanted shrimp scampi you should’ve gone to Olive Garden, Marcia.
5. Finally getting to sit down and eat your (now cold) food five minutes before closing, someone walking in to ask if you’re open and then responding with “Five more minutes? Awh, we’ve got time! Let’s go on in, party of 17 friends we haven’t seen in 20 years! I’m sure they won’t mind us hanging out and talking until an hour and a half after closing! It’s not like they have to clean up or anything! Life is so fun for us!”
I don’t understand people that honestly think this is ok under any circumstances. It’s our job to tell you it’s ok, but I assure you it’s not ok, Ron.
6. When the manager starts to passive-aggressively get the party to leave (turning the music off, letting the staff stack chairs, clearing plates from the table) an hour after they finish their food only for the party to get offended and complain that you’re ruining their nice little get together.
God made living rooms for a reason. Go sit and talk there for as long as you’d like.
7. Getting caught in the middle of an arguing couple when all you want to know is whether they want sweet or unsweet tea.
Do… do you want lemon with that?
8. When you have to serve a friend of the owner and they threaten you with, “Oh, you charged me for my drink? Well, maybe I should give [insert owner’s name here] a call?”
Here’s my phone. Go ahead and call her, CAROL. By the way, that’ll be $2.50 for the tea.
9. That one guy that makes everyone cringe when he walks in.
You know who I’m talking about.
10. “I’m old so I can say this…”
Sorry, Charles, but being 87 doesn’t give you a free pass to sexually harass me.
11. That family that insists on asking you for one thing at a time when they know darn well they need 49 different things that you could’ve just gotten all at once.
4,000 of my steps today were just running back and forth from your table to the kitchen.
12. Leaving a table to tend to the others and that one yelling “Excuse me! Excuse me!” across the room while you’re talking to another table as if they’re the only ones in the restaurant.
Y’all for real?
13. A customer makes an offensive joke and you have to decide whether you’re going to walk away from this table with a tip or your morals.
Sell my soul or hope the lord provides?
14. When someone leaves you a bible track as a tip.
I was saved when I was 6 and I can’t pay bills with a track, Janice.
15. “20% tip?! I don’t give God that much!”
Then maybe you should be giving God a living wage, too?
16. Getting slipped a “get your own boyfriend/girlfriend” note.
I DON’T WANT YA MAN I WANT YA MONEY
17. And finally, getting home at the end of a long shift, settling into bed and closing your eyes for a split second of peace before realizing you have to get up in the morning and do it all again.
Here’s to growing up to be people that are nice to our waitstaff!